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A key strand of my latest visual research includes a handwritten diary kept by various carers throughout my grandma's decline with Alzheimer's Disease. I have also decided to integrate drawings made throughout that time by her daughter, carer, and lasting power of attorney, my mother Sarah Lennard.

 

Embodying these found records, I play with a fusion of influences from vintage children's fables to niche pornography. This is an online sketchbook of sorts with selected ideas and works put together during the Pandemic.

As the illness developed, Grandma's ability to perform the self slipped; expressions of personal consent could no longer be defined - her body changed guardianship. The illness not only erases memories but spontaneously unlocks them, presenting and recalling spectres of power dynamics and social events. Patriarchal machismo entitlement creeps through the lines of broken scripts. 

 

Lingering cultural amnesia around learned helplessness, particularly in regards to the sexualised female body is a theme in this work.

 

Lockdowns were an opportunity to connect grandma's footsteps: conservative family values, the pressures of the patriarchal gaze, and the continued reliance on 'feminized labour'.

Crosswords are a leisure activity found inside newspapers, magazines, in waiting rooms. If you place a gap in the middle it creates, ‘cross words’. 

Cross words surface wrinkles,

design a bruise,

tease out bullets onto dead paper.

 

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to scale

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